Thursday, June 23, 2011
And now that I am older, Things change, I tell myself. It’s one thing to have a desire; it’s another thing to make a desire like this come to life. But I am arguing with the ten year old me who just doesn’t understand that. You don’t have to stay true to a promise you made to yourself when you were ten years old do you? But the ten year old, still living within me, keeps urging me to leave all of my family and friends for this romantic idea of living in the country.
The sun’s early morning beams shone through my cousin’s kitchen window. My husband finished his breakfast, excited to have a little adventure exploring.
“Be sure to wear your tennis shoes, and I will pick you up with the quad in 5 minutes. Meet you out there,” he said to me as I finished my last bite of cereal and ran to get myself ready.
Right when I pulled my sweater up over my shoulders, I heard the roaring engine of the quad. It was my signal to get out there. I grabbed my camera, threw the strap over my head, and ran down stairs. There he sat straddling the quad, looking all manly and debonair. His muscles bulged as he revved the engine.
“Ooooo, Honey, look at you.” I said, but he couldn’t hear me and I couldn’t hear myself from the loud humming of the quad. I pulled my ear plugs out from my pocket and secured them in place within my ears. Yes, you read right, ear plugs. I carry them with me wherever I go. You never know when a loud sound will come creeping into your life, and so I always carry protection. I believe I already suffer from hearing loss, and I can’t afford to lose anymore or I will have to learn sign language. While watching a movie with me, it goes like this:
“Dan, what did the guy say?”
“Dan, what did the girl say back?”
“Honey, I missed the entire conversation that the two main characters just had, and I believe that was the most important part of the movie because everyone is fighting now, and I am not sure why. What were they talking about?”
I already brought up the idea of learning sign language with my husband so that when we are old we can still communicate with each other, but he thought it to be a ridiculous idea, and so you will never find me without my ear protection.
We took off on the quad. It was a bit jarring, which made me wish I had packed my sports bra. My husband wanted to impress me, so he sped as fast as possible down the broken path through the trees. He called something out to me as he pointed over in a certain direction, but for some reason I couldn’t hear a word he said, but I nodded anyway. It was probably an animal or something not of great significance to me anyway. I don’t get that excited about animals. Now if he pointed out a celebrity or something of significance like that, I would jump off a moving quad to get a chance to look at him or her, especially if it was Harrison Ford, twenty five years younger.
Oh Baby! I'd be jumping off a moving train for you.
He drove us to our final destination, the top of a rolling hill. Oh my word, my favorite place to be. We stood atop the hill and looked out at the most beautiful landscape I have ever laid witness to. I don’t get out much, but I have seen pictures. You know, like Ansel Adams? I looked out into the vast surroundings. Trees for miles, green rolling hills everywhere. Only the earth’s curve discontinued our view. It was breathtaking. And the wind was blowing so hard, it was literally taking my breath away. I gasped for air. “Honey, it is hard to breath up here.”
“Imagine this Janna. Living atop this hill, looking at this view over breakfast every single day.” The wind blew my hair across my face, whipping my lip. It was almost too beautiful to take in. My mind did not have the capacity to contain its beauty.
“Yeah,” I stared out into the abyss of splendor, jaw hanging open, my mind beginning to entertain the thought of settling here, making this our home, forever.
But how could we afford this? I mean, we would have to build a house. “Ohhhhh,” I practically sang the word, signifying the brilliant thought within my head. “We could borrow money from my dad.” We looked over at the hill sitting next to us; I pointed, “That is where my parents can build their house.” I picked a spot that was close but not too close. “Every day the kids can run over to Grandma and Grandpa’s house and Jeff and Carrie’s house, I mean, Uncle Jeff and Aunt Carrie.” I smiled as the idea came to life in my mind, “Let’s do it.”
After coming up with house plans, we decided to explore a bit more. We hopped on the quad and continued past rows of Christmas trees, and through fields of long grass. I could smell pine aroma so strong and thoughts of Christmas rushed through my head. And then we had to stop when we came upon the loveliest of sights.
A field of flowers.
Then we made love in it.
But we had an idea of where we wanted to live. Well, at least for the moment.
Women sure are fickle, aren’t they? And I may be one of the ficklest. I don’t know though; I can’t make up my mind.